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Below are the 9 most recent journal entries recorded in
Henriette Stillman's InsaneJournal:
| Tuesday, August 18th, 2009 | |
| 8:11 pm | Henn staggered back herself after shoving cass back out into the real world, her mind was in a whirl, and more than that her emotions were in a hopeless tangle, unaware, or uncaring, as to just how much of that had rubbed off of Cass. Knowing that there as nothing Backstage that would explode, and feeling the itch in her palms that was a precursor to losing control of her newest power, she ran. She ran as hard as she could, finally tumbling out into the real world again, heedless of the whipping wind that sprayed her with ice and a fine mist of equally icy water. She didn't know if it was Siberia, or greenland, or if it was an ice floe somewhere, but she didn't care, it was devoid of people so even if her usual powers slipped, and she knew they were going to, no one would be hurt. She screamed as she fell to her knees, long and high and wordless and instantly ripped away by the wind. She stripped off her gloves, slamming both hands wrist deep in the snowdrift she'd landed in, watching the expanse of snow leech into black, the edges picked out in silver, almost phosphorescent. She shoved herself backwards, tumbling again as the snow and ice in front of her lurched upwards, heaving forward like the death throes of some enormous arctic beast. She didn't know how long this went on, the cycle of surging power, the tossing roil of ice and snow, all she knew was that eventually the cold seeped in, eventually she realized the feel of blood, tacky due to the cold, speckling any and all of her bare skin. Eventually the tangle of emotions had gone from a full boil to a low simmer, but with a cover, her own choke hold, knowing that it could boil over again at any moment. She knew what had to be done, and she knew who could do it for her. She stepped into the Backstage again, carefully working feeling back into her fingers as she walked, stepping out again into one of the few clear spaces in Sneaky's shop, blinking at the change in light, "Sneaky?" He was already standing by with a first aid kit, and if she hadn't been keeping a stranglehold on her emotions, she likely would have broken into relieved tears. As it was she just let herself be led to the back room and sat down on a fainting couch. She sat still and let herself be tended to, giving few minutes before she said: "I need you to cut me off." If Sneaky was surprised, he didn't show it, just shaking his head as he dabbed at the cuts on one of Henn's hands with an alcohol swab, applying gauze tape to the worst of them., "Why would you need a thing like that, Little-Daughter." They all called her that, it made sense since she was the Little-Mother's child. Henn shook her head, the movement almost wild, like a half-tamed animal, "Because I can't let it happen again, because of Clair still screwing me up after all this time." Sneaky shook his head again, finishing with her hands, "Too dangerous." Henn's brow furrowed, "I need..." She sighed, dragging her hands through her hair, "I need to see what's really there, without emotions attached to it, not mine, not anyone's, I need that clarity of vision." Another half-wild headshake, fingers tightening in her hair, "I can't do this again, I still haven't really gotten over the anathema that Clair caused, I can't survive another. She was speaking Shadow whether she knew it or not, the pain and panic and turmoil of the fight with Clair brought to the surface again by what was happening currently, just as raw now as it had been then. Sneaky's brow creased at this, fingers sliding along Henn's jaw, tilting her head up to look her in the eyes, brow creasing further as he absorbed what had happened, finally shaking his head, "Energy poisoning, we should have seen." He sighed, dabbing gently at a cut across the bridge of her nose, "Hn. Yes. I can do this for you, but it will be up to you to undo it. You are the only one who can." She nodded, careful not to dislodge his fingers as he applied a careful, tidy strip of gauze tape. Henn felt the calm seeping in the same as the cold had seeped in earlier, quiet and still and slowly relaxing her choke-hold on her emotions, plucking them away like petals off a daisy. Once Sneaky was done doctoring, Henn thanked him calmly and slipped Backstage once more. She emerged in the kitchen of the Guildhall, almost surprising Petit who was leaning against the counter eating a popsicle, "Back again?" She asked, brow arching. Henn just nodded, "Thought you could use some help, dishes still need to be washed, and I bet the downstairs bathroom hasn't been really cleaned in a while." At least since Artan had been re-vortexed, she was sure, but she didn't say as much, "Same goes for the lair you've made out of the sitting room." Petit's brow just arched higher, but she shrugged all the same, she knew better than to question this kind of thing, "Knock yourself out kiddo." "That's the plan." Henn replied with a nod. For the next few hours she didn't stop moving, cleaning out the fridge and the pantry as well as the medicine cabinet, moving all the furniture to vacuum under it, and doing three loads of laundry before she finally stretched out on the sofa (with its freshly-washed and still-warm-from-the-dryer cushion covers) to sleep. |
| Monday, August 17th, 2009 | |
| 1:22 am | PHEER MEME! A [ ] Achluophobia - Fear of darkness. [ ] Acrophobia - Fear of heights. [ ] Agliophobia - Fear of pain. [ ] Agoraphobia - Fear of open spaces or crowds [ ] Aichmophobia - Fear of needles or pointed objects. [ ] Amaxophobia - Fear of riding in a car. [ ] Androphobia - Fear of men. [ ] Anginophobia - Fear of angina or choking. [ ] Anthrophobia - Fear of flowers. [ ] Anthropophobia - Fear of people or society. [ ] Aphenphosmphobia - Fear of being touched. [x] Arachnophobia - Fear of spiders [ ] Arithmophobia - Fear of numbers. [ ] Astraphobia - Fear of thunder and lightning. [ ] Ataxophobia - Fear of disorder or untidiness. [ ] Atelophobia - Fear of imperfection. [ ] Atychiphobia - Fear of failure. [x] Autophobia - Fear of being alone. B [ ] Bacteriophobia - Fear of bacteria. [ ] Barophobia - Fear of gravity. [ ] Bathmophobia - Fear of stairs or steep inclines. [ ] Batrachophobia - Fear of amphibians. [ ] Bibliophobia - Fear of books. [ ] Botanophobia - Fear of plants. C [ ] Cacophobia - Fear of ugliness. [ ] Catagelophobia - Fear of being ridiculed publicly. [ ] Catoptrophobia - Fear of mirrors. [ ] Chionophobia - Fear of snow. [ ] Chromophobia - Fear of colors. [ ] Chronomentrophobia - Fear of clocks. [ ] Claustrophobia - Fear of confined spaces. [x] Coulrophobia - Fear of clowns. [ ] Cyberphobia - Fear of computers. [ ] Cynophobia - Fear of dogs. D [ ] Dendrophobia - Fear of trees. [ ] Dentophobia - Fear of dentists. [ ] Domatophobia - Fear of houses. [ ] Dychiphobia – Fear of accidents. E [ ] Ecophobia - Fear of the home. [ ] Elurophobia - Fear of cats. [ ] Ephebiphobia - Fear of teenagers. [ ] Equinophobia - Fear of horses. G [ ] Gophobia - Fear of marriage. [ ] Genuphobia - Fear of knees. [x] Glossophobia - Fear of speaking in public. [ ] Gynophobia - Fear of women. H [ ] Heliophobia - Fear of the sun. [ ] Hemophobia - Fear of blood. [ ] Herpetophobia - Fear of reptiles. [ ] Hydrophobia - Fear of water. (large bodies of it anyway) I [ ] Itrophobia - Fear of doctors. [ ] Insectophobia - Fear of insects. K [ ] Koinoniphobia - Fear of rooms. L [ ] Lekophobia - Fear of the color white. [ ] Lilapsophobia - Fear of tornadoes and hurricanes. [ ] Lockiophobia - Fear of childbirth. M [ ] Mageirocophobia - Fear of cooking. [ ] Melanophobia - Fear of the color black. [ ] Microphobia - Fear of small things. [ ] Mysophobia - Fear of dirt and germs. N [x] Necrophobia - Fear of death or dead things. [ ] Noctiphobia - Fear of the night. [x] Nosocomephobia - Fear of hospitals. O [ ] Obesophobia - Fear of gaining weight. [ ] Octophobia - Fear of the figure 8. [ ] Ombrophobia - Fear of rain. [ ] Ophidiophobia - Fear of snakes. [ ] Ornithophobia - Fear of birds. P [ ] Papyrophobia - Fear of paper. [ ] Pathophobia - Fear of disease. [ ] Pedophobia - Fear of children. [ ] Philophobia - Fear of love. [ ] Phobophobia - Fear of being afraid. [ ] Podophobia - Fear of feet. [ ] Porphyrophobia - Fear of the color purple. [ ] Pteridophobia - Fear of ferns. [ ] Pteromerhanophobia - Fear of flying. [ ] Pyrophobia - Fear of fire. S [ ] Scolionophobia - Fear of school. [ ] Selenophobia - Fear of the moon. [ ] Sociophobia - Fear of social evaluation. [ ] Somniphobia - Fear of sleep. T [ ] Tachophobia - Fear of speed. [ ] Technophobia - Fear of technology. [ ] Tonitrophobia - Fear of thunder. [ ] Trypanophobia - Fear of injections. V-Z [ ] Venustraphobia - Fear of beautiful women. [ ] Verminophobia - Fear of germs. [ ] Wiccaphobia - Fear of witches and witchcraft. [ ] Xenophobia - Fear of strangers. [ ] Zoophobia - Fear of animals. |
| Tuesday, February 24th, 2009 | |
| 12:01 am | Meme time! RULES: 1. Put Your music player of choice on Shuffle 2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer. 3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS! (because allcaps makes it more important *nods*) ( Under the cut ) |
| Friday, January 23rd, 2009 | |
| 10:47 pm | |
| Sunday, December 28th, 2008 | |
| 9:20 am | Meme time! 1. What curse word do you use the most? Variations on ‘damn’ 2. Do you own an iPod? Yes, yes I do 3. What person on your flist do you talk to the most? I… don’t think I actually have anyone on my flist, which is weird. 4. What time is your alarm clock set to? Depends on if it’s a worknight or not. 5. Do you still remember the first person you kissed? Yep. 6. Do you remember where you were on 11/9/01? Not even a glimmer in my father’s eye. Or my mother’s for that matter. 7. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? When I take pictures everyone looks like giants and sometimes don’t have the top of their heads. I'm short compared to the people I hang out with. 8. What was the last movie you watched? It’s a Wonderful Life. Shut up. 9. Do any of your friends have children? Yes. It’s complicated, don’t ask. 10. Has anyone ever called you lazy? Why would they do that? 11. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep? Nope, I'm not a big fan of medication at all for anything except sometimes acetaminophen for pain. 12. What cd is currently in your cd player? I don’t have a CD player, I have an iPod. In the house CD player is… uh… I actually have no idea and I'm comfortable so I'm not getting up to check. 13. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? Ewww milk. 14. Has anyone told you a secret this week? …If they did it wouldn’t be a secret any more. 15. When was the last time you had Starbucks? I'm not allowed to have coffee, I get wired just being around people that have had it. If I were actually to have coffee myself, we’re pretty sure I’d start vibrating at a molecular level and bring about Armageddon, or at least a black hole. 16. Can you whistle? I can. Both with my mouth and with my fingers. 17. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? The fact that they’re staring at my tits. 18. What are you looking forward to? New Year’s. Jesus is coming to our party. 19. Did you watch cartoons as a child? I actually watch them more now 20. Do you own any band t-shirts? Probably? Haven’t checked in a while. 21. What will you be doing in one hour? Napping, possibly boinking my husband’s fiancé, or my husband’s fiancé’s fiancée, never a dull moment around here. 22. Is anyone in love with you? Yes. 23. What was the last song you heard? I was listening to Stop by the Spice Girls while making breakfast. 24. Last time you cried? Wait, I'm supposed to keep track of shit like that? 25. Are you on a desktop computer or a laptop? Laptop. 26. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos? Nope. Get tattoos to commemorate things, the most recent being my wedding band, won’t need any more for a while, and strangely I'm not so big on punching holes in myself. Got the one I need. 27. What’s the weather like? Clear, with fresh snow, yay snow! 28. Would you ever date a girl/guy covered in tattoos? This is where I point at my husband who I think may have more tattoos than I do. 29. What did you do before this? Made some toast. 30. When is the last time you slept on the floor? I nap on the floor all the time, it’s comfortable and apparently I'm part housecat. 31. How many hours of sleep do you need to function? In a row? 1. I kind of don’t sleep much. Don’t need to. 32. Do you eat breakfast daily? If by breakfast you mean ‘food’ no, if by breakfast you mean ‘whatever I usually eat’ yes. 33. Are your days fast-paced? Six of one, half dozen of the other. 34. What did you do last night? Played video games and read. 35. Do you use sarcasm? Nooo, why would I do that 36. How old will you be turning on your next birthday? 23 37. Are you picky about spelling and grammar? Not as picky as I could be. I speak fluent lolcat. 38. Have you ever been to six flags? Not all of them, no. 39. Do you get along better with the same sex or the opposite sex? As long as they’re not idiots or jerks? It’s about the same. 40. Do you like mustard? Yes, in all flavors. 41. Do you sleep on your side? Mostly sleep on my stomach, actually 42. Do you watch the news? Hate that fucking show, always so full of disasters and special effects. Can’t deal with it, if I wanted that much drama I’d go watch a movie. 43. How did you get one of your scars? Freak accident with a blender. 44. Who was the last person to make you mad? I don’t get mad, I get even. But, uh, Skadi. 45. Do you like anybody? I pretty much like everybody until they give me a reason not to. 46. What is the last thing you purchased? Sparkly snowflake bra/panties set for when I was stripping for Jesus. 47. What side of the heart do you draw first? Bottom. 48. Can you dive without plugging your nose? Depends on how deep. 49. What colour is your razor? Orange and pearl. 50. What is your blood-type? I… actually don’t know that. That’s probably something I should know. 51. Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours? Like with actual rope? That’s kinky. 52. What is a rumour someone has spread about you? That I have teeth in my hoo-hoo. 53. How do you feel about carrots? They’re…tasty? I'm supposed to have feelings about food? 54. How many chairs at the dining room table? Do we even have a dining room table? I should check on that. 55. Which is the best Spice Girl? Sporty. 56. Do you know what time it is? The lappy doesn’t have a clock, which is weird, so, no. 57. Do you know all the words to the Fresh Prince Theme Song? I don’t think I do, but I could be wrong. 58. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator? Get out my own way. I cheat. 59. What’s your favourite kind of gum? Not so much a fan of the gum. 60. T or F: All’s fair in love and war? Used to say true, now I know better. 61. Do you have a crush on anyone? Actual fulfillable crush? Not any more, already been fulfilled. Celebrity crush? Fuck yes, who doesn’t? 62. Do you know how to use some words correctly, but not know the meaning? Sometimes I can figure out words I don’t know by the context, but I don’t use them if I don’t know what they mean for sure. 63. Do you like to sleep? I guess. Don’t need a lot of it, but I nap sometimes. 64. Do you know which US states don’t use Daylight Savings Time? Arizona is one, other than that I don’t know. 65. Do you know the song Total Eclipse of the Heart? Some people don’t? 66. Do you want a bright yellow ‘06 mustang? Only if it’s actually a Transformer. 67. What’s something you’ve always wanted? Always is a long time to want something. 68. Do you have hairy LEGS? If I don’t shave them, yeah. 69. Would you rather swim in the ocean or a lake? Lake, I don’t like to fuck with tidal pull 70. Do you wear a lot of black? Only because they don’t make anything darker 71. Describe your hair: Extreme A-line cut, variegated red-orange-yellow in the bangs. Though it’s growing out now, probably just bleach out the front to put red streaks in again. 72. Do you have Entomophobia? Bugs in general? Not so much. Bugs that can kill me? Healthy fear. I was bitten by a black widow when I was younger, but survived it, so there is that. 73. Are you an adult? That’s what they tell me. 74. Where is/are your best friend(s)? The Amoeba, plus Che and Jack and Bill 75. Do you have a tan? I'm too pale to tan. I almost glow in the dark. 76. Are you a television addict? Not really, no. 77. Do you enjoy spending time with your mother? (And does she read my lj?) Occasionally, and probably not 78. Are you a sugar freak? No, but I enjoy giving it to other people. 79. Do you like orange juice? Only if it’s fresh. 80. What sign are you? Scorpio. Unless we’re going by Chinese zodiac, then I'm an Ox, Yin Earth. |
| Thursday, November 13th, 2008 | |
| 9:53 am | Cass has started having Dreams, the true kind If I didn't already know it would probably kill us both I'd go somewhere, away somewhere, I don't want to screw him up any worse. I should have known, I guess, when Al told me about the Triad and my potential (always potential, always outside) part in it. That kind of potential is enough to warp people, crack them, and without enough Shadows around, it might. Auntie C. always says that Demons lie, that it's in their nature. Mom says the same thing about family. I would think that in Al's case the two cancel each other out, and besides that, why would he bother lying if the truth is so much more damaging, more damning? Cass shouldn't suffer for something that's in my blood, something he's an accidental part of at best. But he's going to and I can't stop it, can't even do anything about it. I'm starting to understand why mom goes out to wrestle gators sometimes, maybe that's the only way she can get it out, cast it off. I don't know what I'll do. Don't know what I can do. |
| Sunday, October 26th, 2008 | |
| 9:43 pm |  |
| Wednesday, August 27th, 2008 | |
| 7:28 pm | Meme time! Curse you Cass, curse you to heck. And back. List the songs on your What What do you do with a BA in English? (Avenue Q) What's Love Got to do With it (Tina Turner) What if God Was One of Us (Joan Osborne) What's Left of the Flag (Flogging Molly) What Can You Get a Wookiee For Christmas (When he Already Owns a Comb) - (Star Wars Holiday album) What is This Feeling? (Wicked) What Went Wrong? (the Moldy Peaches) What You Feel (Once More, With Feeling) What's Up? (4 non-blondes) Whatsername (Green Day) When When Love is Gone (Martina McBride - Muppet Christmas Carol) When You're Evil (Voltaire) When a Pretty Face (Adam Green) When We Grow Up (Diana Ross) When You're Good to Mama (Chicago) When You're Standing Next to Me (Mitch & Mickey) Where Where's the Girl? (Voltaire) Where do we go from Here? (Once More, With Feeling) Who Who do You Think You Are? (Spice Girls) Who's Got the Crack? (Moldy Peaches) Why Why Don't we do it in the Road (Dana Fuchs cover) And bonus: How How do I Get There (Deana Carter) How I Saved Roosevelt (Assassins) How Many Times do You Have to Fall (Richard Thompson) How Shall I See You Through My Tears (Once on this Island) How Would I Know (Melissa Ethridge) How (Lisa Loeb) |
| Monday, August 25th, 2008 | |
| 8:35 pm | Henn wasn't nervous, not really, after all, Cass was a dear friend and she was still just a little weirded out by the fact that she was older than him now as opposed to being some years younger. Mostly she was just ignoring that fact, because he was still Cass. It had taken her a while to find a good place in the Behind-the-Scenes for a picnic, but she had found one, and she knew how to get there from her apartment, now all she had to do was wait. The fact that she was checking the sidewalk outside from the window every few minutes was purely coincidental. Really. |